What works best for you? Going it alone, or being part of a team? For your best success you really need to figure out which you are and be true to yourself.
I've tried to lose weight as part of a partnership before. I failed miserably. Why? Probably for the same exact reason I am not fond of team sports: I'm afraid of screwing up the team. And, worse yet, when one of my partners falls down I feel like the team is down, so therefore I am down. I stop trying.
Also, when I am in a state of focus on self-improvement, I've found I'm kinda wobbly- I'm focused like a laser beam in an attempt to get solid footing on a new venture. Consequently, I'm easy to tip over! While a lot would look at a partner as a source of support, I look at another person as someone who threatens my balance. To me, it's sorta like two people trying to walk on a tightrope at the same time.
The truth is, all that trying to be part of a weight loss partnership has ever done for me is set me farther back than I was when I started. I finally reached the conclusion that I really am better off on my own.
On the other hand, I can be great in a workout partnership, but it takes a particular kind of person for this to work for me: He has to be male (women don't tend to push me hard enough), knowlegable about lifting so that I don't have to be a trainer while I'm trying to get a good workout, pretty danged muscular (if I'm going to be lifting heavy with you, I need to be able to relax enough to know you can keep the 150 pound weight from crushing me), very dependable, and ON TIME! I'm prompt- A lifting partner who is not also prompt tends to cause me a great amount of stress. It's very hard to find all of these things in one person, BTW. My current lifting partner even leaves a little something to be desired in the promptness department.
On the pack animal side, there are three guys in my gym who work out together cross-fit style with amazing regularity. I think the camaraderie is what keeps them coming back and pushing themselves harder. They continue to do what works for them, day after day after day. They have my respect.
I also know ladies who would rather go to their weight loss meetings in packs. They cheer one aother on and meet regularly, encouraging each other to make smart choices. In some ways I very much envy them and the compatibility. As a naturally social person I very want to be a part of the group!
I remember one particular instance about 6 months ago when I was sitting in a restaurant after my Weight Watchers meeting. At a table nearby there was a group of gals who not only went to the same meeting, but also had gone to church with me. One of them spokekindly to me when she passed by to use the restroom, but I was most certainly not invited to join them. Did I feel a little self-conscience sitting there alone eating my grilled steak and sweet potato without butter while they laughed and had a good time together nearby? Yes. But eventually all of them stopped going to the meeting- One of them dropped off and then the rest quit in quick succession (this further proves to me that my "If one falls, the rest aren't far behind" theory). It might also be worth noting that I reached my goal weight and am STILL going to the meetings to help maintain my weight loss. Alone.
This isn't to say I don't believe in supporting others: I do! I sincerely desire to support and encourage others to lay claim to their own health and be the very best that they can be. I truly feel this is part of my calling, and I enjoy it. I'm a big encourager at my Weight Watchers meetings, I'll spot anyone who asks me in the gym, and on-line I try to help as many people as possible. Sometimes I will also seek out support and encouragement. These things energize me! But for the actual work of getting the job done for myself personally, I need to think of myself as a one-woman team.
I know I'm not making a very good case here for the pack-animal mindset, but the point is that I thought it through, found my reasons for choosing to go about my weight loss the way I did, and then DID it. I'm hoping that by relaying my personal experiences you will start to think about what will work best for you.
You also need to be very honest with yourself about not only what style works best for you, but also your circumstances: You can be as convinced as anything that you'd do better with buddies, but if you live on an isolated island and want to be healthy, you'd better accept the fact that if it's going to happen you're going to have to develop the determination to do it by yourself.
Lone Wolf or Pack Animal? Which are you?
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