She said WHAT?????

Today in the locker room at the gym I ran into two gals who are always there, but I've only ever seen on the cardio equipment. Both of these girls appear to be in their 20's and are very heavy. I know how much weight training would benefit them, so I asked, after we'd chatted a couple of minutes, "So how come I never see you girls in the weight lifting area?" Honestly, I was pretty sure I knew the answer, but I wanted to encourage them to venture over there so that they could reap the rewards of going to the gym faster.

One gal, the heaviest of the two, responded honestly that she's a bit intimidated and doesn't feel like she fits in. I told her she pays gym membership, so she has as much a right to be there as anyone else and no one there would think a thing of it- she's working out just like everyone else. Then she said she'd love to try, because she would like to increase her muscle, but that her friend didn't want to go over there.

So naturally, I asked the friend why she felt that way. And she said (this blew me away) "I don't want to be defined." Say WHAT? I tried to keep the look of disbelief off of my face and the sarcastic comment ("Then why are you coming to a gym?") from shooting out of my mouth. Instead I very gently asked "Could you explain what you mean?" I thought for sure she'd tell me I'd misunderstood. She said "I don't want muscle tone."

Nope. I didn't misunderstand.

I told her I look like I do, in part, to lifting weights on and off for 24 years. And she said, no kidding "I don't think that looks good. I don't want to look like you." She looked embarrassed, but she sure as heck said it.

I told her that's okay, she didn't have to look like me if she lifted, and asked her if she understood the benefits of having muscle go beyond appearance and that it will facilitate her weight loss efforts. She said she did, but she had no desire to have muscle tone. Yeesh....

I didn't know what to do with this woman, so I turned my attention to her friend.

Her friend told me she thought I looked great, that she saw me in Walmart on Sunday after church and thought I looked nice in a dress, when I'm not pumped up. She seemed to get the big picture that I didn't walk around with bulging muscles all the time. Thank heavens!

At that point I shared with her that I've done almost all of my workout alone and that she could look similar to me, that it takes time, but it's worth it. That I've lost quite a bit of weight and she can achieve whatever she puts her mind to.

I told told them both that if they had any questions about lifting or wanted to try equipment and didn't know how to use any of it to ask me- I'd be happy to help them. They walked away- to do their cardio, presumably.

I really wish there was something magical I could have said to them- particularly the open minded one.

I know that all too often heavy people think that the people who are at or closer to their ideal weight are looking at them judgmentally when they are in the weight lifting area of the gym. For the record, I don't care how heavy you are- I'm just glad you're there! I'll answer questions if you ask me and help all you'll let me.

And my guess? If you ask anyone in the weight lifting area who looks like they know what they're doing for assistance they'd be happy to help you, too.

You can't get started if you don't start, and the benefits of weight lifting aren't just for those who are already fit. While I understand the reasons for feeling intimidated, I'd like to point out that the only way to stop feeling intimidated is to improve yourself. One of the fastest ways to improve yourself in the gym? Lift weights!

That's all I got for today. I hope this helped somebody!